God’s Design for Sexuality


The world has promoted its views of sex but does that align with God’s view? Do you know what God had in mind when He designed sex within marriage?

What we do with our bodies declares our worship to God. A lost and dying world needs to see the reality of Christ in our lives through the choices we make, including sexually. Singles, when you remain sexually pure and save yourself for your spouse, this speaks to an unbeliever. Married couples that are faithful to their marriage covenant states that you are different from the world around you. The intention of Christian marriage is to be a billboard of Christ and the church. But the opposite is true as well. When we as believers walk in sexual sin it gives the unbelievers reason to blaspheme God.

Let’s look through the scriptures for God’s view of sex in marriage.

The marriage bed is honorable.

“Christianity is almost the only one of the religions which thoroughly approves of the body—which believes that matter is good, where God Himself once took on a human body.” C.S. Lewis

“Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.” (Hebrews 13:2) Sharing your body with your spouse is not a bad thing.  You are fearfully and wonderfully made.  Sex within marriage is something to celebrate.

Sex is wonderfully powerful resulting in creative reproduction.

“Sex is an instinct that produces an institution; and it is positive and not negative, noble and not base, creative and not destructive, because it produces this institution. That institution is the family; a small state or commonwealth which has hundreds of aspects, when it is once started, that are not sexual at all. It includes worship, justice, festivity, decoration, instruction, comradeship, repose. Sex is the gate of that house; and romantic and imaginative people naturally like looking through a gateway. But the house is very much larger than the gate. There are indeed a certain number of people who like to hang about the gate and never get any further.” Chesterton

Reflects the Trinity

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and they shall become one flesh (Genesis 2:24).” The three shall become one. The trinity is the perfect unity, as husband and wife come together they reflect that unity. Union in marriage reflects the union of the trinity.

One Flesh, Soul glue binds us together

The scientific facts are that dopamine and oxytocin are released in the brain during sex. When Dopamine is released it stimulates ‘desire and reward’ by triggering an intense rush of pleasure. It helps us remember the details. Oxytocin is known as the bonding chemical. It deepens the feelings of attachment and makes couples feel much closer to one another after they have had sex. This is why sex outside of marriage is destructive, and causes deep heartache when the relationship is broken.  However, within marriage it provides the beautiful connection between hearts. 

Protects one another from temptation.

When you give yourself willingly to your spouse you remove the temptation for them to go elsewhere to fulfill their sexual desires.

As Christians we should see sex as a healthy part of marriage. 

See sex through the lens of scripture.

Pray over this area of your marriage.

Talk about sexual intimacy together.

Consider your spouse needs over your own, in all areas including intimacy. You both should be edified in the process of intimacy.

I know many couples struggle in the area of intimacy for various reasons. I remember hearing a pastor say, “Satan tries to get in bed before marriage and keep out of bed after marriage.” Married couples don’t let this saying apply to you; enjoy what God has given you as a couple.

If you have questions regarding sex within your marriage, try reading Act of Marriage by Tim Lahay, it’s a good resource.

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